This was keeping the ‘List’ from being completed. Task one was to write every member in my family. It sounded like an easy task, but I have a big family – 25+ at last count. So to overcome this I decided to set smaller attainable goals. My goal went from – write every member of your family – to – write 2 members of your family. I then made this even more specific. I chose 2 names: Britt & Chad. I sat down this morning and wrote 2 notes, and plan to mail this this afternoon.

Here are 2 keys to learn about setting Goals

1. Make achievable goals with a timeline – By refining my first goal from write my family to write two members of my family by Friday. I was able to set a goal that was achievable. These small accomplishment build momentum that carry into the next task.

2. Be as specific as possible. – The moment I picked two names it made my task very easy. I didn’t have time to think and second guess who I should write. I had the names and went for it.

Next weeks task – Get the addresses of the rest of my family and mail the notes I have already written. Side note: it’s hard to send mail without an address

1. The knowing that we tried something new…something to test us. To often in life we don’t step out and try something new because of fear. Fear of failure. It takes a lot to try…to try something new, but when we do we have a great sense of accomplishment – even when things go bad. We have the knowledge that we tried. By trying we will either taste defeat or taste victory, but we can only taste victory by trying.

2. You learn – the only way to learn is the try something new. To push yourself. Remember you will never stop living if you never stop learning. Remember this tip: after you try something new ask yourself ‘What can I learn from this?’ Through failure or victory you can learn.

So what was the last risk you took that went wrong, and what did you learn from it? I would love to hear your stories share them in the comment area.

seeing eye dogs are nothing new in Morristown. The training facility is in town, and you often see them out and about. The only thing different about it this time was the dog was blind…ok that’s not true. But what if he was? Would the man follow him? My gut reaction is no…like a speaker thumping, bass resonating – NO. This got me going down a rabbit hole of questions about trust, and the way this man had to build trust in his dog.

Now I have never tried it myself, but I would guess that trusting a dog to guide you takes time. I mean my first instinct would be hesitation. I would walk one foot in front of the other. Step by step. But I’m guessing this would not be good for me or the dog. My inability to trust him would have resonate through in my body language. I could keep this up for minutes, hours, days, months, years, a lifetime…or I could jump. You see I realized that to earn trust at some point we have to jump in – get our feet wet, and let the dog, person, whatever it is earn our trust. If we never jump we can never trust.

I realized I trust a lot of things because I tested them – breaks on my car, that coffee is hot, God will provide, that my Dad can beat me in a wrestling match. But I never would have earned this trust if I didn’t at some point jump in, and test them/it. So who are you trusting? What do you want to trust? Have you jumped in?

I would love to hear your biggest fear – what would you love to trust, but haven’t jumped into yet?

Now how amazing would it be if I felt that way every time I thought about God – my heavenly father. I often wonder if I really understood his true love – would I not search for him more. Long to be closer to him. Desire his words…his teaching…his heart. How many more times would I weep over him?

First off this is an amazing place to go eat if you are ever in Summit NJ. The place is small and full of character. Nothing much has changed since around the 1950.

The goal of the meeting was to read ‘Old Man and the Sea’ by Hemingway. As most of you know this was a big challenge for me. I don’t read much, and completing a book was one of my goals for 2009 – it’s part of the ‘List’. We choose this book because it was short and a quick read. We had 2 weeks to read the book. I started out really strong. I went online to find the book. I found a great website that allowed me to download a PDF of the book. This was a great start – I was so pumped to read the book. Like most people I started off at a sprint, and died way before the finish line. I read 10 pages the first day, and had every intention to read more…then life happened. Things came up, people wanted to hang out, work got busy, I went home. Didn’t touch the book for a week.

On Saturday night I arrived at the airport to find that I had a 3 hour delay. I thought ‘Great!’ – this is the perfect time to read the book. I got lucky and found a used bookstore in the airport, and to my surprise the had a copy. I bought it  grabbed a tea from Starbucks and headed straight to my waiting area to read. As I sat down I opened up the book read a page, and then started playing on my iPhone. Next thing I know I had put down the book, my flight departure time went from a 3 hour delay to a 30 minute delay. The book stayed shut the entire flight home.

I had failed. I read 10 pages of a book – and this is a small book. I sat at the table at the dinner thinking I have nothing to offer. I wouldn’t even finish this little book. Really getting down on myself. This blog is more about the idea of failure and the realization that it happens – but we learn from it. If we take no chance. If we don’t push ourselves. We gain nothing – we never learn. Never grow. Failure is fundamental to life. If you have not failed then most likely you have not pushed yourself.

Now me and Mr. Randy go way back. His daughter was a year younger then me in youth group so he was always part of the trips. I spent many a nights in hotel rooms keeping him awake at 2 in the morning. We spent summers together at youth camp, and he poured his heart into me. Many times he would spend hours preparing for Bible studies, and Sunday school classes just to have me show-up and provide a distraction. But no mater how much pain and frustration I provided – and I am sure it was a lot – he never stopped praying and caring for me.

So as we stood around talking I could see Mr. Randy get this little grin on his face. As prayer time started we brook up into groups of 2. A little side note here – I had never been to prayer time so I had no clue what to expect. Do we pray silently, out load, in a group, alone – there really should be some instructional material provided before attending. As we went about the task of diving up the groups Mr. Randy made it very clear that he wanted to pray with me. We prayed together and poured out or hearts to the Lord. After we were done Mr. Randy locked me into his arms and talked me those words we all love to hear ‘I’m so proud of you!’ As I look back at it I should have been the one thanking him. He poured in 20+ years of his heart into me. He showed me how to love through his actions towards his family. He thought me how to have faith, even when things look down. His dedication and time – caring for my spiritual soil – allowed my roots to dig in deep. He helped provide the foundation. I like to think that he part of the miracle-grow that allowed me to sprout into a God loving man.

I will never be able to thank him and the many other mentors enough, but something tells me that seeing the fruits of their labor is really all the thanks they need. As I read Bill Hybles’ book ‘Courageous Leadership’ he made something very clear. The church needs leaders, and only leaders can raise good leaders. If you have been blessed as a leader if is our mission…our life goal…to pour into others. To mentor them. The dedication will be extreme. The process long. The hours many. But the rewards endless.

So who are you mentoring? Have you found someone? And don’t forget mentoring is a 2 way street. To be a good mentor we must have a good mentor. If you don’t have one – find one – FAST!

When I got home I put the list on my dresser and went to bed. The next morning I got up energized with the possibility of completing the list. I set out thinking of what I would do, who I would help, how to get them all done. Well here is the sad part – it’s June. Yes almost half the year is gone and the list still sits. Doesn’t have many check-marks, and still siting there staring at me. So this is where you come in. I am dedicated to completing the list this year. You guys, as my readers, will become my accountability team. Every 2 weeks I will attempt to complete and write about a different goal from the list – starting next week.

Task one is already picked out – 1. Write every member of my family and tell them how special they are to me.

This is week one of my ‘List’. I will say that I strongly believe everyone needs a list. Something to keep us motivated. Something to push us to complete dreams, and live a fuller life. If you have a list I would love to hear it. If not – make one – NOW! Checking next week to see task 1 on ‘the List’

Okay so quick flashback to help frame the story.

4 weeks ago – yes 4 weeks ago, before I even heard Dave Ramsey’s message – I made a challenge to myself…’Matt I want you to buy one random stranger coffee this week’. The first day I woke up, got dressed, and went to the local coffee shop. All the way to the coffee shop I was looking around for people to ask…someone to serve…someone to love. What did I do? Nothing! I went cold. Day after day week after week. I looked, but could never act.

you see the great thing about giving is the fact that at it’s core it is loving someone with no string attached. When you give you ask for nothing in return. You open up your heart, and you become vulnerable…but that was just it. Inside I feared rejection. What if the person says no? What if the look at me funny? For a few weeks I decided that I was going to ask the person behind me in line…never happened. Either no one would come in, or worse it would be a young lady, and I thought ‘Great she is going to think I am hitting on her’. The  thing is that I realized that giving is not about me. I was letting my fear of others hold me back – holding me back from expressing the love God has placed in my heart.

Well today I finally did it – but not how you think. I didn’t walk up to the homeless man in the street, I didn’t ask the person behind me in line – actually I didn’t even talk to the person. I realized that giving comes no string attached, and that means the person doesn’t have to know ‘who’ did it…’who’ gave. So this morning I walked into the coffee shop. I ordered my tea, and when the line had cleared I walked up to the register, pulled out my wallet, and handed the barista a $10 dollar bill. My instructions where simple…’Tell the next person that comes in that their drink has already been paid for. If that ask by who tell them a friend. Whatever is leftover put it in the tip jar.’ She took the money and said ‘thank you’. I took my tea went to my normal table, sat down, opened my bible, and started reading.

Well i was around when the next person came in. It was a middle aged man – maybe in his early 40′s – driving a Mercedes SUV. The baristas knew him well. He ordered his ‘regular’ and then I heard her tell him…’It’s already paid for.’ The man hesitated…did a little double take and asked ‘What?’ She let him know someone had already paid for the drink. He said thank you, and when on chatting with the baristas about his night before. It’s wasn’t an amazing story. No struggling mother of 30. No Time Magazine worth story, but it didn’t matter. Inside I felt good…I was happy…I realized that giving becomes contagious. That the ‘good feeling’ is really how God desires us to feel all the time. That is his heart – a GIVING heart.